The Virtual Voice of David Niall Wilson

The Red Room - and the Approach of Nanowrimo

October 10, 2008 | by David Niall Wilson

I was asked today to join a writer’s site called The Red Room, and decided to take them up on it. They have a lot of promotions planned for Nanowrimo - and since I am a big supporter / proponent of that fine, annual month of mayhem, I signed in. I have a profile page at The Red Room now, and I’ve uploaded one poem, and my story - which some of you may not have red before - “More Than Words,” which features past lives, Egypt, and the libraries of Alexandria.

My Red Room Profile Link

More Than Words - read for free

-DNW

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Kurt Vonnegut, Smuggling Wheelbarrows, and Therapy

October 10, 2008 | by David Niall Wilson

It’s probably a little early in the process for me to start commenting on an audio book I’ve only just started listening to, but I can’t help myself. God bless him, I love Kurt Vonnegut Jr. - and even though I’ve only read the introduction, written and read by his son, Mark Vonnegut, and part of the first speech - read by Rip Torn (love that name - always reminds me of Dash Riprock on The Beverly Hillbillies. That character was played by Larry Pennell - who most of you probably did NOT know played KIMOSABE in the cult movie sensation BUBBA HOTEP)

kimosabe.jpg

Anyway…two things so far have stuck with me. One is a joke that Vonnegut used to tell. It involves a man who crossed a border every day with a wheelbarrow load of junk. Every day, the man in charge of customs went through the wheelbarrow with a fine-toothed comb, trying to figure out what the man was carrying across the border. The guard was certain the man was a smuggler, but though he searched every inch of the wheelbarrow every day, he could find no contraband.

Finally, the guard pulled the man aside.

“I can’t stand it any longer he said. I am not going to arrest you, but I have to know. Every day you cross the border with all that junk, and I cannot figure out what you are doing!”

The man looked at him, smiled, and said… “I am smuggling wheelbarrows.”

There are a lot of uses for such a joke…it certainly teaches one to look at what is right in front of their face. I’m sure I butchered the joke - I’ve only heard it once, second hand…forgive me?

The other thing that stuck with me was that Vonnegut had a distrust of psychiatry (I do, as well, to be honest) He was afraid, or so he says, that if he went to a therapist they might make him “normal,” and that if they did he’d no longer be able to write. In fact, the man’s greatest fear seems to have been that every great idea he ever had would be his last…

His son Mark re-assured him - “No therapist is that good.”

It does make you wonder, though, about how our minds work…two different people see the same thing. One can describe it, make stories up about it - the other barely notices it is there, but when he reads the words his companion writes about it - remembers. Vonnegut also said that if you can’t write a thing down clearly, maybe you don’t think as well as you think you think (lol). So true. How many times have I wondered why someone who seems perfectly eloquent in conversation goes to write something down, and has trouble remembering to use conjunctions, or to conjugate verbs properly? A lot of times, that’s how many.

Anyway - the audio book is ARMAGEDDON IN RETROSPECT - and I highly recommend it, just on the strength of what I’ve heard so far. I’m certain I’ll continue to annoy you with things from it as I listen…it’s what blogs are for…you can talk and talk and even though people can click away, they can’t interrupt.

-DNW

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Star Wars Lol Dogz … Becuase I had to…

October 9, 2008 | by David Niall Wilson

funny pictures
moar funny pictures

Laugh it Up Shortychick - new Lolz

October 9, 2008 | by David Niall Wilson

funny pictures
moar funny pictures

To Lighten Things UP… Halloween’s Coming…ZOMBEATLES

October 8, 2008 | by David Niall Wilson

Thanks to Agent_M for the link…

Why I REALLY Don’t Trust Politicians - McCain & Palin in Particular

October 8, 2008 | by David Niall Wilson

All my life I’ve heard Americans talk out of both sides of their mouths about politics. They remember the great men of history, and they talk about patriotism, and freedom, and famous presidents they never encountered with awe. They visit monuments and libraries, but they don’t know those men, they know what has been said and written and preserved, each word reflecting the opinions, thoughts, and attitudes of the author as much as the realities of the subject. Then there’s the way Americans talk about current and recent politicians. Jokes, insults, cries of how much better it could be, and all from a terribly selfish viewpoint.

My point is simple, and I’m not going to go on at too much length, just going to make it. My comparison point is going to be a Priest. Many will find this odd, coming from me, because I’m not a big fan of the Catholic Church - but bear with me. It’s exactly the kind of thing I hate in politicians that has poisoned the religious hierarchy over its centuries of existence. The word respect departed the building long ago. We have more respect for Tiger Woods and Michael Jordan than we do for any of our political leaders.

A Priest hears his calling. He devotes himself to the study, philosophy, and duties of the priesthood. He forsakes marriage, a family of his own, and offers himself in service. That is the ideal, anyway. To me, this is the type of man who would be the ideal politician. The idea that politicians are public servants is now so laughable that it’s a wonder we still use the term at all. I’m sure that politicians of the past had their personal agendas and interests, but they spoke their minds, and they were - if history can be believed at all - passionate about the country.

Politicians should be called at an early age. I think every distraction they add to their lives becomes another cloud fogging their vision. If they already have business connections, they are human - they will protect their business connections. If they have a large family, children, pets, etc. - do we want a man or woman who can set that aside and serve the country, or a man or woman who devotes themselves to family? The answer, to me, is that a man who has chosen a family, and business, to build his career on should not go into politics.

Just to clarify…I believe there have been great partnerships between men and their wives in government, and I believe some politicians whose children are grown and self-sufficient have the time and energy to devote to the country, if they are willing. It’s those who have young children, still in school, active business interests, and a lot of personal baggage that I am talking about. If they have that, and claim that they can set it aside for the country, they are either lying, or they are not sincerely devoted TO their family in the first place, or to their business - and business is a responsibility. This implies an emotional disconnect that seems - to me - to be morally dangerous.

Men go into the White House and come out gray and old. This kind of aging isn’t from the stress of leading the nation - it’s from the stress of trying to meet their family, business, social obligations while leading the nation. It’s from the conflict of doing what you’ve negotiated yourself into doing rather than what you believe, of saying one thing when you clearly mean another because it’s expected of you. It’s from not believing that they are all out to get you, but knowing it.

John McCain very obviously does not respect Barack Obama at all. He claims to, but Obama is a seated Senator in congress with a decent record. He does not deserve third grade name calling.

John McCain said “There’s no time for on-the-job-training” while telling us Sarah Palin is a quick study. How does that work, exactly? Joe Six-pack is important, yes, but I don’t want Joe Six-pack running the country. I don’t want Josephine Six-pack either.

Obama is a bit more low-key, but his attacks are just as demeaning to himself, and to the system, as McCain’s, and Senator Biden is just as consistent in his inability to back anything with specifics - or, more pointedly, with specifics that are actually true. Both sides continually spout ‘facts’ about one another’s voting records in congress. I’d like a true account of exactly how they came to the decisions they made. Who lobbied for and against the bills in question, who spoke to them personally, who did they do a favor for to gain something in return? That’s how it works, right? Illinois needs a bill passed to reform their prison system, so when the Senator from Alabama asks for support on an economic bill he’s putting forth, the Senator from Illinois “trades”. It’s like some warped version of the stock market, trading in votes - and we have no Jesus to throw the money-lenders out of the temple.

Meanwhile, Sarah Palin more and more shows her true colors. Words slip through. Stories come out and have to be squashed. She’s not just a smiling hockey mom; she’s dangerously right-wing and cripplingly conservative, and just BUSTING to let that out. If she understands where the lines of propriety are drawn when it comes to personal attacks against respected politicians, she ignores them pointedly. If she understands the separation of church and state, it’s only that she understands how appearances must be maintained.

Here’s a thought for Bible Spice, either you believe the wacko-bird things your youth and church seem to indicate - or you do not. If you do, you are compromising that faith by concealing it in your political life - if you do NOT believe it, then why does it keep popping up? Why did you have a witch hunter perform a prayer ceremony for you? Why did you claim that the earth is only 6000 years old? You do know, right, that it takes MILLIONS of years just to make the oil you claim to be such an expert on? And if all of that is just not true, and you are not a creationist who believes people speak in tongues, why can’t you just stand up in public and say you don’t believe it? You won’t say you do, or you don’t, which seems an answer in and of itself.

This election, the state of the economy, and the government in general, is our own fault. We are too selfish to give up our lives to pursue any sort of “fix.” Almost any intelligent man or woman, if they dedicated themselves to it, could become a part of a solution - could volunteer and become part of the government on some level - or support for others willing to sacrifice, but most would rather watch CSI and hope whoever bought Washington this time out fixes it so we can get back to beer commercials. America needs more men like T. Boone Pickens, still making money, but willing to share knowledge and wealth in a positive fashion.

There is no one acting in service to the country, as far as I can see, beyond the level of the soldiers fighting the war, and even the upper levels of the military start hedging their bets, worrying over the condos and yachts in their futures, and wondering if they can get in on some of that big oil money and government green if they play their cards right.

God Bless America

We are a nation of fools.

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Relevance in the Land That Won’t Stand Still

October 7, 2008 | by David Niall Wilson

This morning I started listening to a an audio book of short stories by another author I’ve personally never encountered. This author that I have no intention of naming has won awards, teaches at a prestigious university, blah blah blah. The writing itself is strong, but the stories have what I consider to be a major flaw, at least if any sort of larger audience is intended for the work.

The characters are very difficult to give a damn about. They are mostly middle aged or older. They are not likable - so flawed in most cases you’d as soon they got hit by a freight train as cough up their stories - in a couple of words I sum it up, at least for myself: not relevant.

These stories have morals and messages, and the author is obviously a man of insight. That’s what, to me, makes it a shame he can’t seem to bring those messages to life with voices and characters that hold my interest, or don’t outright irritate me. Yes, I know that we write about different kinds of people, but there is a point of relevance - a point you have to reach and maintain - where your readers not only can understand who your characters are, what they are doing, and why - but can also feel that it is important to relate to it.

Stephen King has given me hundreds of older characters it was easy to empathize with, care about, and learn from. In his novel Insomnia almost all of the characters are elderly, but it doesn’t matter. He gives them life and vitality and “character” - and he brings that story to life. Some will - of course - argue that this is not one of his best books. I believe part of the disconnect on that is the absolute difficulty of bridging generational and cultural gaps in fiction.

You have to, though. If you want your voice to be heard, you have to know the world around you. You have to pay attention, open your mind, accept that your own view is not the only one, and learn from people and places that make you uncomfortable. The minute you fall into a “comfortable” life you might as well hang it up. You might develop a “comfortable” audience, but it won’t grow, take root in any younger segment of the culture, or leave any memorable mark on the world. The reason is simple - today’s world is already fading into tomorrow’s world. As a writer you have to have a foot in the past, a foot in the future, and walk that thin line as historian-prophet. You have to fight for your relevancy, usually against yourself - it’s not easy to stay in touch, even if you choose only a small area for that connection.

Yet - it’s essential. If you want the words to be magic; you need the proper ingredients for the spell. If you want your stories to mean something, first you have to gather them around you and get them to listen up - the readers - the young and the old, the timid and the bold - as many as you can send threads out to snatch.

You have to be in constant inner motion, because this world won’t stand still…

-DNW

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In Honor of Monday - I bring U new LOLZ

October 6, 2008 | by David Niall Wilson

funny pictures
moar funny pictures

Diamonds and Rust - The Acoustic Storm & Sunday Night

October 6, 2008 | by David Niall Wilson

Let me preface this by saying that I absolutely loathe commercial radio.  It’s unfathomable to me how it even exists in this day of Ipods, MP3 players, and Sirius Satellite, but there it is.  I very seldom turn it on, but the day conspired against me.jbdr.jpg

It started the night before. Saturday night we were up very late waiting for my son to return from a trip with friends to Bush Gardens.  While I waited, I figured I’d set the MP3 player up with an audio book for the drive to Virginia, where I pick up my two boys from a previous marriage every other week.  Anyway, I won’t name the author, but I chose short stories that should have tipped me off by the fact they were only burned on CD for review and awards consideration and had been published as downloads on a web site.  Further evidence of the horror to come should have been the Native American cutesy titles of the stories.  Nothing prepared me for the reality.

Sunday morning I popped the cord into the MP3 player, cranked the speaker, and found myself listening to arguably the worst narrator I’ve ever heard droning on about the wind spirit maripowhatsit and the love she had for the bulbous-toed frog spirit, or some equally asinine drivel.  I’ll tell you, I was actually ANGERED by it.  I pulled the plug on that fast with a promise to myself to ritually SMASH the CDs when I got back home.  I listened to various rock stations, flipping madly about in the hope of hear something - ANYTHING - that I hadn’t heard so many times the music made scream, or a station without some moron making sophomoric jokes, or a loud-mouthed advertising  “voice” screaming about factory invoice pricing.  Not good.

The one high point was the discovery of a song I wasn’t familiar with - Breathe(2AM) by Anna Nalick - a vocalist I was also not familiar with.  She sounds to me something like a cross between Tori Amos and Alanis Morisette.  I try to keep up on music, but it’s as futile a pursuit as trying to keep up with all the new authors - and probably even more annoying because to find new music requires listening to a lot of crap before you get what you are looking for.  Anyway…a scrap of the lyrics stuck in my head and I was able to look it up - track her down - and add her to Pandora:

“2 AM and I’m still awake, writing a song
If I get it all down on paper, it’s no longer inside of me,
Threatening the life it belongs to
And I feel like I’m naked in front of the crowd
Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud
And I know that you’ll use them, however you want to”

On the road home from taking the boys back, I flipped onto our local classic rock station, ready to cringe, and was met by a radio show - syndicated - called “The Acoustic Storm.”  The DJ and the format are as cheesy as it gets - breathy voices acting like they are calming you - stupid weather references - you can imagine, I’m sure - if not, here’s their web page - find them on a station near you and give a listen: The Acoustic Storm.

The point is, I hit one of those magic strings of songs that can carry you away.  In the past this has usually happened with an album, or late at night on some off-hours radio show where the advertisers have less say in what I will “like” — or when someone else forced me to listen to something new, and they were correct.  It started with The Moody Blues, which was pleasant - Tuesday Afternoon.  Next was Yes - And You and I, Live from La La Land - and Jon Mellancamp’s Small Town.  Then we hit Joan Baez - I don’t know why, but with the radio cranked, that gorgeous acoustic guitar strumming in the background, and her love song to Bob Dylan rolling from the speakers, I was blown away.  I know that’s what the song is about; it’s a haunting call in the darkness from one great, poetic voice to another.

It got me thinking about lyrics, and poetry, and stories, and how they mean one thing to their creator, and something absolutely different to each and every person that encounters them…no less magic, just different.  If you don’t believe that explain how that same hit - lyrics mildly modified - became a hit for Judas Priest, who I’m fairly certain had nothing at all to do with Bob Dylan…

I arrived home pretty soon after that…nothing after Joan hit that same level, though the contemplative, thoughtful mood she brought me lingered.  I’ll leave you with more words…hers, not mine - but they are mine as I use them - as Anna Nalick suggests - any way that I want to…

“Now I see you standing
With brown leaves falling around
And snow in your hair
Now you’re smiling out the window
Of that crummy hotel
Over Washington Square
Our breath comes out white clouds
Mingles and hangs in the air
Speaking strictly for me
We both could have died then and there

Now you’re telling me
You’re not nostalgic
Then give me another word for it
You who are so good with words
And at keeping things vague
Because I need some of that vagueness now
It’s all come back too clearly
Yes I loved you dearly
And if you’re offering me diamonds and rust
I’ve already paid…”

Joan Baez

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“Say it ain’t So, Joe,” or This Mascara Don’t Run - Palin / Biden

October 3, 2008 | by David Niall Wilson

I try not to do this very often.  There are enough “pundits” in the world, and it’s not one of my aspirations to become another.  In fact, the ones I heard right after the debate, furiously spinning things to find a positive take on the debate for Sarah Palin, sickened me nearly as much as the debate itself.

jo.jpg sarah.jpg

Cute phrases and crap read off of note cards should not qualify one to be vice president.  That’s what we got last night.  Biden, for all his faults, and for all the fact that it’s exactly because he DOES know how things have always worked in Washington that he’s a problem, at least knew what he was talking about.  Why would Palin come in and try to argue with the man about what has happened in the Senate?  Even if she’d had MONTHS instead of weeks to study up on it, there’s no way she could do anything but read whatever they gave her, and it was so often flawed that she began to look silly.

She said Maverick more times than McCain did in his own debate.

While it’s not really an important point, the woman can’t say the word nuclear.

While she’s all about “winning” in Iraq, if her definition of winning matches what she said the “surge” could do in Afghanistan then we’ll be there forever.  She seems to believe we will terraform the Arab nations into little versions of home.  Democratic governments, run by the people, who will embrace hockey and Saturday morning cartoons.  She’s horribly naive.  Maybe while talking about Afghanistan she could explain why, if that is where the terrorists are, why we quit fighting there and invaded Iraq in search of non-extant weapons of mass destruction.  Probably, though, she could not.

Biden made some pretty good points.  Maverick McCain might be, but currently not on any subject that matters.  He’s party line on the things that are really killing us right now, Iraq and the Economy come directly to mind.

The worst thing about these debates is that the candidates so seldom address the question that is actually asked.  Neither of them answered the first one, which was whether or not the voting up, and then down of the 700 Billion dollar bailout was a high, or low spot for congress.  I thought maybe Biden would answer it, but he got distracted trying to get out his canned speech.

A telling point was when a question Palin didn’t know the answer to was asked, and she pretty much said (paraphrased) I’m not gonna answer that — and then went on to read her notes on energy again.

Her entire view of energy independence (according to the speech) revolves around drilling for domestic oil.  Not one mention of alternative fuels, natural gas, or anything else.  Drill baby Drill.  She actually freaking SAID THAT.  Sure, she attributed it to others, but she managed to get that, the “Say it ain’t so, Joe,” and the “Joe sixpack” into her little speeches.

One last note - same sex marriage.

Biden got cornered, and in the end would not sanction same sex marriage - but he did actually say that what the civil union is called should be left to individuals and their faith - but that all civil unions, no matter what genders are involved, should be treated equally by the law.  Palin did NOT agree.  She agreed that she did not sanction same sex marriage, but when pressed to say she agreed that all civil unions should be treated equally, she pressed her over-glossed lips together and remained silent.

She didn’t say she didn’t agree, but make no mistake - of the two - only one believes that a gay couple should have the same legal rights as a heterosexual couple, and only one of them SAID that.

I’ll end this with the one question I’d have loved to hear asked of Governor Palin …

Science tells us that it takes millions of years for organic material, collected beneath the surface of the Earth, to become oil - a substance she claims to be an expert on.  If this is so…where did it come from if the planet is only 6,000 years old?

In other words - I’m not comfortable with a woman a “heartbeat from the Presidency” who seriously believes that man co-existed with dinosaurs or that the world is less than a million years old.  You want bi-partisanship?  How are you going to get that from someone who can’t even be swayed by common sense?

Enough!  On to the day, and to writing.

-DNW

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